Corporate perks

Yesterday, Puppy received through his work dealings ... an iPad! The best thing I've ever received through my work was a blanket. One that I am supposed to return because its cashmere-ness exceeds the amount we're allowed to accept when it comes to gifts.

Zero stars

Netflix has done away with the feature where you leave notes about movies for your friends. I am so disappointed in Netflix because that was one of my very favorite features.

I am at such a loss. How else will I let people know what I thought about this weekend's movie-watching: A Serious Man (2 stars; Judaism is much more interesting than the movie let on.), Rabbit-Proof Fence (3 stars; I should have realized a movie about walking would be kind of dull.) or Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead (3 stars; Nice power outfits, Christina Applegate!)?

What am I, chopped liver?

The head of our department, to whom three of us in cube-land report, comes into the office each morning usually after the rest of us have arrived. And each morning, she announces cheerily, "Good morning, [insert name of one individual]!" and never bothers to say hello to the other two of us.

I think this is something that bothers me.

A word of advice

If you're a consultant, hoping to woo business from a potential client, do not keep him waiting at a coffee shop without any word whatsoever that you may be running late or unable to make the meeting.

Now that I'm back in the office after wasting 30 minutes, I'm less likely to take another meeting.

Like, omigod! Totally gag me with a spoon

So all day yesterday and today, The Corporation has invested in some training for our department. We're focusing on "executive presence" which essentially means working on our speaking and presentation skills.

Once again, we get to experience the embarrassment of viewing ourselves on camera, critiquing each other's oratory styles and trying not to stutter.

Our trainer, a very energetic woman with a tendency to jump around the room and run around the table, stopped me mid-sentence yesterday and said I talked like a "valley girl." She said that this would change as I age - as my peer group gets older and I no longer surround myself with people who speak with "valley girl" inflections.

Clearly, she has not met my friends and she doesn't realize just how much MTV I watch.

Promises promises

It appears that one of the Vallejo boys paid Beetle a little visit last night, drawn by promises of free libations. But when Beetle had the audacity to charge him for his drink, he grabbed Blanca, stormed out of the bar and told Blanca how pissed he was that he had to pay. Beetle, apparently, had forgotten that he promised some free booze in return for the Vallejo boy finding his sunglasses in the depths of the Russian River!

Stood up

I was supposed to meet up with SameBrain for a drinkie or two after her dinner with a married man, but she's not returning my texts or voice messages! I guess I've been stood up!

No matter, this is a great opportunity for me to catch up on "Big Love." I'm two episodes behind!