Crazytown, Italy

This morning I woke up and went to the airport to board my fligth home after this long journey. When I arrived at the check-in counter, the gate attendant directed me to the self-service kiosk, insisting that she couldn't help me. So, I tried to check in, but failed. Returning to the attendant, I sort of gave attitude when I told her that the kiosk refused to help me check in. It turns out I was at the wrong airport! Fortunately, I was able to get myself on another flight to Paris that will arrive well in time for me to make my connection to Boston.

So now I'm in the airport lounge, killing time on the ultra-slow internet. An older lady with a tacky pink sweatshirt tucked into her high-waisted jeans (like just under her boobs) and a floral-print bucket hat walked into the lounge seemingly to scream at the lounge receptionist. She's asked for someone to take her to her gate "Now! Now! Now!" The helpful receptionist arranged someone to pick her up, but couldn't confirm when he would arrive, so bucket-hat lady responded, "Thanks for nothing!"

Promptly thereafter, she ran over to the bar area and screamed, "I need a drink so bad! So bad!" and poured herself some Johnny Walker Black Label" in the largest glass available (no ice). It is just after 9:00 in the morning.