Movie note: Lost Boys: The Tribe

ONE STAR

But why did Corey (Haim? Feldman? Feldman. Haim died, right?) speak like he was constipated the entire time?

Thank God

One positive thing about working in Massachusetts, where the majority of my co-workers are Catholic, is that Good Friday is a slow day at work. And everyone leaves early, including me!

The Patridge family

I'm dismayed at television for giving Audrina Patridge, the least interesting girl on The Hills (except for Stephanie), her own reality show. Of course, I checked out the first episode and I'm glad I did for two reasons:

1. I have now been introduced to Audrina's mom, the perennially tanked leather bag who acts more like a wronged teenager than a mother.

2. I'm 98% sure the opening song has the lyrics, "Ooooohhh ... I sharted."

It's all very appropriate.

Marathon Monday

Many organizations in Massachusetts celebrated Patriots' Day yesterday with work closures, community parades and other such festivities. Patriots' Day also is when the annual Boston Marathon takes place - and I'd been informed that it's a big day of celebration for Bostonians each year.

Since our workplace does not recognize the holiday, I went to work last year on Patriots' Day, just like any other day. This year, however, I decided to take the day off and join in the revelry, mostly because friends were in town from DC to run the thing.

Cheering for marathons is kind of crazy. I'm also very bad at it. I met up with my friend toward the end of the route, and we watched out for Poochie, whose pace we were monitoring on the BlackBerry. Before he passed us, I noticed all these hundreds of people, running, limping and crawling by. Some were being carried off on stretchers and others simply looked like death. It reinforced that I never want to run one of these things.

When Poochie came running by, I totally missed him (like I missed Puppy in the Chicago Marathon several years ago), but I did get to catch up with him at the meeting point at the end and congratulate him on finishing. And re-qualifying for next year's Boston Marathon, which I can't decide is a good or bad thing.

Girl talk

I miss my friends! Last week, Reebs birthed a new baby, so Dickinator came to town for a little visit this weekend. Coincidentally, TurboBoob was in town for a family Pesach celebration, so we were able to spend last night hanging out and cooing over the baby.

The four of us lived together in college nearly fifteen years ago, along with six other characters and a cat. So, we had a pretty good catch-up session, talked a lot about babies, other friends, some frenemies and our current lives. And it was nice hanging with people who could check me whenever I said anything that might have rung untrue to myself or really ask the hard questions about my job, Boston, my family and Puppy.

Since Reebs is still tired from her labor and all, Dickinator, TurboBoob and I capped off the evening with some delicious food and drink. It really was lovely spending time with them yesterday.

I demand a judges' save

I didn't care too much when American Idol voted Pia off, but I'm so sad that Jaclyn was sent home packing on this week's America's Next Top Model!

She was the only likable one in the bunch, and she took great photos! I loved her squeaky air-heady voice and wanted to see her in Morocco. Although, it would have been better if ANTM sent them to Canada, like dum-dum Alexandria guessed.

Quality control

The other day, I accompanied one of my colleagues who's responsible or product quality to one of our stores and we assessed our product. We looked for loose stitching, uneven hems, puckering, stains, shade variation, dry crocking and other product defects.

It was an interesting visit that definitely heightened my appreciation for our quality team's job. I'm not quite so detail-oriented to review product so closely, so I guess it's good I do what I do, instead.

But at the end of the day, it was nice to get out of the office for a few hours and spend some time in a mall!

Celelb sighting: Cynthia Rowley

I was pretty sure I saw Cynthia Rowley at last night's ICA opening. So, naturally, I have been doing some internet stalking this morning and it appears she is in Boston!

Artsy fartsy

Last night, DJ Mother Nature took me to the ICA for the opening of a new exhibit by Catherine Opie, a photographer who is apparently known for images of football youth, lesbians of all ages and surfers. Sadly, none of those works were included in this collection, but the exhibition was still nice - mostly sunsets and Boy Scout jamborees and womyn.

I've wanted to visit the ICA since arriving to Boston, but it's so rare that I take time out to do cultural things. So, I'm grateful that DJ Mother Nature suggested I accompany him.

It's a very small museum, and I think the building was more interesting than the actual works of art within. Since it was an opening reception for members, there was very good people-watching. DJ Mother Nature knew several people, including an agressive and annoying lesbian and I actually ran into a former co-worker! It was nice to get out and about on the town and do something different. Or do something, period!

Workplace boundaries

I'm growing increasingly displeased at work. It's all come on very suddenly, and I fear it's gathering momentum like the proverbial snowball. And the worst part is, I seem to be feeding directly into a vicious cycle, spiraling down into an unproductive mess.

It pretty much started last Monday, became exacerbated on Tuesday, seemed to get better throughout last week, then plummeted back down yesterday.

As I was packing up my things to leave the office, my boss called my BlackBerry (from another building on our corporate "campus") and asked me to wait for him to return for a little discussion. I thought it was in reference to a vendor to whom I'd sent a stern message a few minutes prior, but he surprised me by closing the door upon his arrival.

It seems his boss, whom I met a few hours earlier, felt I was "detached" in our meeting and not my usual self. So, he asked my boss to check in on me. In truth, I'm not terribly pleased with how things are going, but it's been a particularly painful week of nonsense. It's nothing from which I can't recover, but I guess I'm no good at masking the strain.

The problem is, when my boss comes in to ask me if everything's okay, it really puts me on edge. I don't come to the workplace to discuss my feelings. And if I'm not happy about work, I am not about to share that with my superiors. Maybe that's not the best way to deal with things, but I've seen too many people get burned when they're honest about how they're feeling. I don't need to get saddled with the "attitude" label and boxed into a position with no prospects.

And when my boss shifts gears to ask if everything's okay "at home," in a condescending, faux-caring manner, it makes me want to die. If things aren't okay at home (which isn't the case), I certainly wouldn't burden my colleagues with my personal problems. Maybe I'm old-school, but work is work and home is home. In many cases, I'll build friendships that cross from work to home, but if this has not happened naturally, I resent anyone who tries to force it. And I'm not about to unload or moan about my cat nanny or lack of fun bars to my boss.

I'm told our HR partner may contact me to check in on me as well. That should be a fun conversation. All this "caring" just makes me want to find a new workplace.

Movie note: Monsoon Wedding

THREE STARS

People eat marigolds?

More ching chong ching chong

The other night, Puppy brought home a very drunk lady. After she learned that I was of Chinese descent, she discussed how her chicken fried rice from the night before didn't turn out too well. And later, after I told her I am not a very prolific chef, she said she would call me when she next would make chicken fried rice, so that she would be able to make it properly. Racism.

Ching chong ching chong

I never claim to understand Chinese, but once in a while I surprise myself when I hear something or remember the word for something. Last week, for example, I was pleased to order a piece of cake in Hong Kong and asked for a plastic bag so I could take it with me. It's the little things.

At work today, I met with a group of vendors, two from Hong Kong and two from Korea. In the middle of my spiel, I mentioned an initiative I hoped these vendors would invest in, and one of the Hong Kong-based folks said to the other in Cantonese, "They always ask us to cut costs, but then ask us to do extra things."

To which I replied, "Well, we see these minimal costs as investments that will reduce costs over time through..."

It was a nice moment.

Schizo supper

Last night, I finally had the pleasure of meeting Puppy's former roommate, an older gentleman from Texas oil money who suffers from schizophrenia, cancer and imaginary diabetes. Accompanying him was his manfriend of several years, a fuzzy-haired fellow obsessed with conspiracy theories and a tendency to wear ladies undergarments.

We gathered for dinner at Fakey Saccharine and So So Deaf's home, where they and Puppy created a meal as an homage to the grand dinner parties that Puppy's former roommie used to host. Dinner was tasty and clearly is not helping any effort to maintain or shrink my waistline.

When Puppy's former roommate arrived, it looked like one of his eyes had closed shut. Upon a bit of prodding, we learned that this was due to "diabetes" and that it would return to normal in two weeks. On further prodding, we learned that he could, in fact, open this eye, but that he chose to close it in order to avoid seeing double. Fakey Saccharine retrieved a sleeping mask from his bedroom, which was quickly fashioned into an eyepatch - something that did not come off throughout the entire evening.

Dinner conversation was much more normal than I expected. I didn't witness any responses to auditory hallucinations or any building of structures from stones - two things that apparently have happened in the past during dinners with this couple.

I did, however, get involved in a trying conversation with the roommie's manfriend. He started talking about abolitionists and Martha Washington and Alaska. It was a lengthy ramble where he would begin a thought, only to let it trail off without reaching any point. From time to time, he would ask me if I was following, and to tell you the truth, I wasn't. And it was not for lack of trying! I was really giving it a good effort, but I simply could not follow. When no one came to help me out of this "conversation," I decided the rest of my night should be spent trying to avoid eye contact with this man.

Trying teamwork

In the past few days, I've endured several of my most irritating pet peeves at work, such as:

* Being appointed scribe in a small group breakout session
* An all-day team offsite
* Collective wordsmithing
* Group editing of PowerPoint on a projector
* Being put on the spot to present without any warning

It hasn't been the best week at work.

Annual performance review

Yesterday I had my annual performance review with my boss. Here's a nifty tip for you managers out there: If you would like to have a constructive conversation about performance, do not schedule it for the morning your employee returns to the office from a 3-week trip to the other side of the world and it's probably a good idea to let him/her know what the subject of the conversation will be.

My meeting invitation was simply "Touch Base," which, after three weeks out of the office, I took to mean simply that my boss wanted to catch up. But when he handed me a piece of paper outlining my bonus for the year, I realized I had stepped into my review. Simply put, this was one of the most confusing and frustrating conversations I've ever had. Throughout the hour, I was told many different things, paired together below to highlight lunacy:

1. You need to be more strategic. You need to pay closer attention to details.
2. You need to have a more aggressive stance on which factories we should not be using. Never stand in the way of business needs when it comes to factories we should use.
3. You're taking on too much work. You need to reach out and support other parts of the business.
4. I'm pleased with everything you've accomplished this past year. You will not be receiving a merit increase.
5. The only way to increase your compensation is to get promoted. I do not know what you need to do in order to get promoted.

And the irony? I got to work in a good mood, thinking how much I was looking forward to making progress on the work ahead of me. I left in a decidedly worse mood, thinking how much it blows that I am woefully under-compensated for the work I put in.

Also ironic? The fact that my boss insists the bottom-line message is that I have done a wonderful job and that I have a bright future ahead at the company. It's clear to me that he was struggling to provide feedback, but instead of offering anything constructive, he babbled some platitudes and counted down the minutes until our meeting ended.

When the beat goes boom

I'm very busy catching up on the television shows I missed while traveling in Asia, and at the top of my list is All About Aubrey on Oxygen. When Ms. O'Day made her debut years ago on Making the Band, I became instantly intrigued by her, the obvious star of the show.

And as a member of Danity Kane, Aubrey still kept my attention, even though I started to relate better to some of the other girls who were more down-to-earth. Still, Aubrey's sass was interesting and kept my attention. Hell, I even bought her issue of Playboy!

So, as she tries to make a comeback, I am interested to see how Aubrey's journey continues. This show, however, is a hot mess. There are so many contrived situations, her makeup and clothing are ridiculous and her "friends" are horrible. I enjoy the parts where she's rehearsing, in the studio and generally doing her music thing, but I could definitely do without the rest of it.

Brothel bar

The other day in the lobby of my Hong Kong hotel, I ran into PocketMan, a fellow I met several years ago in Sydney and haven't really been in touch with since. We ended up going out for a drink my last night in Hong Kong, a city PocketMan knows well since he travels there for work nearly every month.

We went to Aqua Bar, with a spectacular view of the harbor. After catching up over a few drinks, we headed back toward the hotel and passed an alley where a little old lady stood and implored passers-by to get a drink. Clearly, it was a shady, shady venture, but PocketMan felt up for a little adventure and pulled me into the alley.

We made our way through the alley, past an older man and a little boy eating dinner on some stacked crates, and into a tiny little bar. In the bar sat a blond man with a little Asian lady hanging all over him. Behind the bar were three young Asian girls wearing tank tops with plunging necklines. They had listless expressions on their faces and leaned against the bar so that their breasts looked fuller.

After approximately two seconds in the doorway, I decided I couldn't stand to be in the bar a second longer, especially since I couldn't handle the overwhelming stench of urine. I told PocketMan that I wasn't staying and he tried to convince me to stay for just one drink. I declined and walked out.

At the alley's entrance, a different lady, older than the first, asked, "Why you no stay for drink?"

Huffily, I answered, "Because it stinks like piss in there!" and briskly walked away, with PocketMan following quickly behind.

I'm not the kind of panda who likes to support prostitution, especially where the girls are probably underage, sold into the sex trade by their parents and clearly unhappy to be involved. But I guess it makes for an interesting introduction to Hong Kong's seedier underbelly - and an awkward end to my Asian trip.

Movie note: Tangled

THREE STARS

My, what big eyes they have!

Movie note: Clash of the Titans

TWO STARS

They're making a sequel to this boring mess? I wish they hadn't discarded the clockwork owl.

Movie note: The Tourist

TWO STARS

Nice clothes!

Movie note: Burlesque

THREE STARS

Xtina did a better job than Elizabeth Berkley and Cher makes a great Robin Antin!

Movie note: TRON Legacy

THREE STARS

How did they know to film all those scenes when Jeff Bridges was younger? I should have seen this when it was in the theater.

Dining in

Usually when I travel, I'll have room service a few times. This week in Hong Kong, however, my family has been in town, so I've been dining with them or I've had work-type dinners.

And at each meal, it's been more than a feast! We've had suckling pig, hand-pulled noodles, dozens of dumplings, hot pot and countless other delicious, delicious yumminess.

But now the family has left and I ditched the reception for today's conference, so I got my room service groove on. It was disappointing. And expensive.

Hong Kongference

I spent the afternoon at a conference at the stingray-shaped Hong Kong Exhibition and Conference Centre. I found only three of the nine presentations at the confernce, billed as something about sustainability in the supply chain, to be relevant to me.

Other presentations were either too technical for me (something about fungicides to be used in treating leather, anti-mold mechanisms, hide prices, etc.), but they were mercifully short.

When I looked up how to get to the Centre, I feared I might get lost from the MTR to the building, but smart Hong Kong built a bridge over several blocks of streets, directly to the facility. It was neat being in the iconic building, but I'm ready to get back to the office.

MTR man

I miss living and working in a city. For the past few days, I've been going from meeting to meeting throughout Hong Kong, relying mostly on the MTR (subway) system for transport.

It forces me to walk a bit more, learn how to navigate from place to place and it reduces my carbon emissions! The MTR system is very efficient, fast and clean, which makes it that much more pleasurable. I guess I wouldn't be so keen on public transportation if I still had to deal with Muni.

Radioactive dinner

For dinner last night, I met a woman who does similar work as I do, but works for another brand, based in Asia. She suggested a Japanese restaurant near her office and I love sushi, so I was game.

We entered the empty restaurant, sat at a table and began perusing the menu. It occurred to us that maybe sushi wasn't the best idea at the moment, but we threw caution to the radioactive wind and enjoyed our meal.

Sevens and sustenance

Yesterday was one of those Sundays that felt very long, yet extremely unproductive. It started out with a delicious, fast-paced dim sum outing with the cousins on my mom's side. Our party was too big for the table, so we basically had to stand up and reach across the table each time anyone wanted some food. And despite having eaten straight through the past week, it was as if we'd never eaten before and the food would disappear instantaneously upon arrival.

After inhaling lunch, my siblings, their significant others and I headed up to see cousins on our dad's side up on The Peak. There, we spent several hours watching the Hong Kong Sevens on television and taking turns in the fancy massage chair.

Rugby is a pretty interesting sport to watch. I don't really know the rules, but each game lasted only about 15 minutes, which was great for my short attention span. Add some chips and other munchies, and it was a nice afternoon while it was cold and rainy outside.

I walked through some stores on the Kowloon side, then it was time for another meal. We went to Xi Yan, one of those "private dining" restaurants that's becoming pretty ubiquitous in Hong Kong - where you are treated to an innovative meal and don't have to deal with crazy crowds.

Our meal consisted of several courses, each prepared with great care and presented artfully. Some dishes seemed Japanese-inspired, others had flavors of from different parts of China and all were delicious. It wasn't your typical Chinese buffet and it was a special meal that I won't soon forget.

Ain't no party like a Hong Kong party

After a long day of travel yesterday, I arrived in Hong Kong, the final leg of my Asia trip. My father hosted a big family dinner with my grandmother, my uncles and all the cousins in town. Like always, it was a big feast and I continue to overeat at every chance I get.

When dinner was finished, all the "youngsters" headed out to Lan Kwai Fong to a newish bar called Hyde. But first, we had to get through the drunken masses in town for the Hong Kong Sevens - an annual rugby tournament that brings people from all over the world for a crazy weekend of messiness.

People were wasted, wearing all sorts of costumes, and spilling into the streets. Even for Hong Kong, it was unusually active and reminiscent of Mardi Gras. Probably something that would have been fun for me about a decade ago.

We finally made it to our destination, ordered up some ginormous beers, and caught up. The bar quickly filled up and the party really got going - only to be stopped abruptly by a police raid.

The po po came in with a cute dog who seemingly was sniffing for drugs. They pushed their way through and made it impossible to enjoy ourselves in the bright lights. Apparently, this happens in Hong Kong when nightclub proprietors don't cooperate with or pay off the police. It was a relatively minor annoyance, and we were able to get over it quickly once they left.

And once the lights dimmed again, I noticed a familar face in the crowd - a friend from b-school who was in town for the rugby tournament! I hadn't seen this friend since our graduation in 2004, so it was fun to catch up with him - very random to run into each other in a crowded Hong Kong club.

After downing some magnums of champagne, it was time to call it a night. It was fun to go out with the cousins, tear it up a bit, but return to my hotel without being a complete disaster. I guess that has come with my advanced age.

Comedic cooking

Our big adventure for today was a Vietnamese cooking class! We gathered early in the morning to go on a tour through the cramped, hectic Hoi An marketplace. Our tour guide introduced us to all the different vegetables and fruits (One interesting one was called a "woman's boob" or something. Apparently it has no English name, so that's the rough translation from Vietnamese.), walked us through the various areas where seafood was being hacked to death and where chickens were being chopped up.

It was kind of uncomfortable, being a big, lumbering American who didn't fit under the droopy tarps while little Vietnamese women pushed their ways around me. I was definitely feeling claustrophobic and it's a good thing we didn't stay long because the various smells were beginning to get to me by the time we finished the marketplace visit.

Next on our tour was the obligatory, but seemingly unnecessary boat ride down the river. This time, we went to the cooking school/restaurant, where our instructor greeted us. The instructor apparently teaches the same class five times each day, so he tried his hardest to inject some levity into it. He made fun of people, told inappropriate jokes and laughed at all of us.

We learned to make several Vietnamese dishes, but the most interesting thing to me was making thin sheets of rice paper, which are basically used to roll everything edible up in Vietnam. The entire process takes about a day, but we were invited to try our hands at just the final part - spreading the rice batter onto a steaming cloth and gingerly peeling it off once finished.

As we worked on this delicate procedure, one of the instructor's helpers came up to Cousin Beezy and yelled, "You fail!" because she had done a poor job at spreading her rice batter. Actually, I think they determined that her burner wasn't working properly, but I laughed at her misfortune.

Later in the course, the instructor grabbed Cousin Beezy's camera to take our photo. He told her to "get close to your lover," to which we responded loudly, "COUSINS!"

Hue to go

The weather here in Vietnam hasn't been of the expected hot and muggy variety; instead, it's been downright chilly, gray and windy! It kind of put a damper on yesterday's pool party, but spirits were lifted at dinner when our party of 44 descended upon a very delicious Vietnamese restaurant.

And somehow, after about a week and a half of non-stop eating, I roused myself early this morning to hit the breakfast buffet before our day of touring Hue, the former capital of Vietnam situated about 2.5 hours away from Hoi An. Our plan was to do some Hue sightseeing in the morning, followed by some leisurely biking around town.

We started by visiting the former emperor's palace - a compound similar to China's Forbidden City. We went through relatively quickly, our guide pointing out things like the number of gates, different buildings and some statues. To be completely frank, it wasn't terribly interesting, but the cool weather and throngs of other tourists definitely didn't help.

Next up was lunch! We had another multi-course Vietnamese meal in a restaurant where everything from the napkins to the chopstick wrappers felt moist. The food was good, but I probably could have skipped the meal.

Our driver took us a few blocks away to visit a pagoda, where statues had beards and mustaches made of actual hair. It was pretty grody.

For some reason, after the pagoda visit, we were taken down the Perfume River by dragon boat. On the boat, a lady tried to sell us some various arts and crafts, but some members of our party decided instead to sleep. It was kind of a pointless journey, but I guess it probably would have been prettier on a warmer day. It probably would have been smellier as well, so maybe the cool weather was a good thing.

Upon returning to shore, we made the decision to ditch the bicycling part of the tour in favor of visiting the fourth emperor of the Nguyen Dynasty's tomb. The tomb was actually another compound with several buildings, like a smaller version of the palace grounds. It was actually quite peaceful, featured a nice moat, and the damp, gray weather lended a nice peaceful quality to the visit.

Some of Cousin Steppynose's friends decided to rent old-timey garb and get dressed like emperors and concubines for a photo. Since there was no photographer on duty, we took their photos - along with a gaggle of French tourists.

After our time at the tomb, we piled back into the van and headed back to Hoi An. It was a pretty long day, and the tour was only okay, but I was happy to see something other than the tailor's shop!

Tailor made

For Cousin Steppynose's marriage celebration, we traveled yesterday to Hoi An, a small town with literally hundreds of tailor shops where one can get custom-made garments. It's a quaint little town, definitely caters to tourists, and is much more manageable than larger Vietnamese cities like Ho Chi Minh or Hanoi.

We spent the afternoon in a few tailor shops where my siblings and mother got measured for different garments. It was fun picking the different fabrics, mixing and matching them with jazzy lining materials and considering what other garments can be made.

It's really difficult to tell one tailor from another. They all offer similar fabrics and display the same types of garments: coats with funky overlapping collars, basic suiting, silk blouses, etc. It's hard to see how any of these businesses survive!

Because I have too many clothes in the first place, I didn't order anything to be made. Instead, I offered my criticism and opinions, even when unsolicited!

Let's talk about sex, baby

Today was one of those days that make it all worthwhile. I feel inspired, that my work is meaningful and that there's a sense of purpose behind what I do.

For a bit of context, let me rewind a day. At one point during yesterday's Mekong Delta tour, our guide discussed the country's problem with population control, contributed in part by an unwillingness to discuss sex in Vietnamese culture. As a consequence, not only is unwanted pregnancy on the rise, so are STDs like HIV/AIDS.

Cut to today's factory visit. We recently partnered with a Vietnamese factory to invest in a factory-based health education program for women in developing countries, and today I had the chance to observe a training session.

Since the training was conducted entirely in Vietnamese, I didn't understand the content, but I got a sense of the discussion from the condoms, leaflets and birth control pills that were being used as props and handed out. I especially liked the photo used on one of the instructor's slides, pasted for your convenience above.

Entering today's training, I was worried that the training session might be fruitless, given my understanding of the discomfort surrounding talking about sex. The women in the session, however, seemed very engaged throughout the doctor's presentation. And when it came time for questions, they were eager to learn more! The participants seemed hungry for this information and it was clear that these concepts were new to them. I was relieved to see this level of engagement and felt good that our investment was not in vain.

Today's visit also included a meeting with the factory's management team, who shared some of their experiences in implementing the program. Sure, they cited some frustrations, but most of them had to do with logistics and not the core content of the training. Everyone seemed to believe in the importance of delivering health training. There are opportunities to deliver the program more smoothly, but nothing that cannot be overcome.

But what I didn't expect was to hear the factory managers cite this investment as a potential competitive advantage. Even though the training program was launched only a few months ago, they have already seen participants taking these learnings back to their families and communities. The factory is beginning to earn a reputation as a preferred employer and people in the community seem to appreciate the added investment in worker education. In a time when all factories, across all industries, face tremendous challenges in recruiting Vietnamese workers, this is an obvious business benefit.

In thinking about my career path, I never would have imagined that I'd spend a day at work sitting in a sex ed class in Vietnam, but today has turned out to be one of the most gratifying days of my career.

Rolling on the river

Most of my family has arrived in Ho Chi Minh City, so there are people for me to hang out and talk with during the weekend! Today we embarked on an organized tour of the Mekong Delta - a part of Vietnam apparently known for fertile land, coconuts and high-grade sand.

I've been on many of these kinds of tours where you're loaded onto a bus, the tour guide tells you about local history and points out sights, you stop at a bunch of stations where people sell "artisan" crafts (at 200x the price it should cost) and you eat a big lunch of local food. The routine's the same, whether you're in Mexico, India, South Africa or Vietnam, yet I continue to go on these excursions.

It's all so fakey, but I don't know any other way to see new parts of the world. 10 of us loaded onto a bus, learned about the Mekong area, and stopped at a temple where people offered to take photos of us with a ginormous buddha, seemingly made especially for tourists. The photographers reminded me of my visit to the Taj Mahal, but the background was a lot less impressive.

We then took a boat to some island where they harvest honey made from bees who pollinate longan plants, so it's especially sweet and fragrant. We looked at a bunch of stuff made from coconut wood and shells, sat down to eat fruit and try the honey tea, then were serenaded by a local "band."

The band consisted of a few musicians who looked extremely bored, two female singers dressed in traditional Vietnamese dresses and one male singer who, sadly, was not wearing a traditional Vietnamese dress. The first song they sang was about the region. The second song was about tourism (Really?). The third song was a love song and I didn't catch what the fourth song was about. I didn't really enjoy the music, but we felt guilted into tipping, of course.

We then got onto these wagons dragged by tiny horses to another spot about a mile away. This part of the tour was a bit sad - the poor little horses were pulling carts of overweight tourists up and down a stretch of road in the blazing heat. I thought maybe this would make a nice campaign for PETA.

After a brief spot to take a photo with a python around our shoulders (no thanks), we got onto little rowboats that cruised down a canal. This part of the tour felt very much like Disney-Vietnam, since it was obvious the boats had motors, but women rowed us along anyway. Vietnam is so charming and romantic!

We boarded the original boat, made a pit stop at another island where a local family made some icky coconut candy and sold arts and crafts made from coconut shells (I overpaid for a small gift for Puppy.), then re-boarded the boat for land.

Then it was time for lunch. These tour lunches are always so awkward. All the tourists sit at tables in one area, while the tour guides sit sequestered in another area of the restaurant. The food, however, was very interesting and pretty good. We had weird puff balls made from rice flour, some frightening-looking fish, tasty vegetables and other dishes I cannot remember. The highlight for me was the super-sweet Vietnamese coffee.

We then bussed back to the hotel, and received a geography/history lesson along the way. I think the most interesting thing to me has been learning that the Vietnamese refer to the "American War." It makes sense that they don't call it the Vietnam War, but I never really thought about it before.

The doctor is (reluctantly) in

For my travels this past week, our buying agent sent along a babysitter who met me in the Hong Kong airport on Monday and basically stuck to my side until today. I appreciate the support, but it does get tedious spending all your time with someone you don't know very well and who doesn't speak great English. To be fair, I didn't really try to communicate in Cantonese, which would have been an utter failure.

Yesterday, on our last day together, our relationship hit a new point (I don't know whether it was a high point or a low point.) where my friend decided to share. I guess he got to the point where he thought he could trust me with details about the past six years of therapy he's enjoyed.

We talked about many different topics, including the following:

* His trepidation about getting married several years ago. It's no surprise that his now wife encouraged him to seek therapy.

* The pressure he faces as a Chinese man to support his family.

* Societal pressure that discourages him from getting in touch with or expressing his feelings.

* The "little boy" who lives within him and the wall that surrounds him.

* His fear of accompanying me on this trip to Indonesia and Vietnam because he'd never been to either country and because as he "counted down" the days to this trip, his imagination created frightening scenarios of what was to come.

* The conversations his adult self has with his inner little boy in order to convince himself to try new things.

He shared all these things and more, leaving me a bit dumbstruck and unable to respond. I felt like I should also share my personal challenges, but I barely emote, so I didn't go down that route.

I will never again ask him his weekend plans, the catalyst for this major overshare.

Bang. Wink. Smack.

I visited a denim factory that produces jeans for us as well as other brands like G-Star and Mavi. One line was producing for Fornarina, which the factory manager explained to me is a "Japan brand." I'd never seen Fornarina jeans before, but all I could think about was this ridiculous mess:

Indochine influence

The breakfast buffet is probably my biggest indulgence whenever I travel overseas for work. I love sampling all the different foods and taking advantage of the variety of cuisines available.

At today's feast, I had the usual fruit, eggs, sausage, etc., but also indulged in a big bowl of pho. After all, I am in Vietnam! Usually, I skip the dessert area, but one of our VPs informed me that this hotel has very good chocolate croissants. So, I felt like I had to give it a try.

And I'm so glad I did! It was one of the best chocolate croissants I'd ever had, so I had to eat two!

The other pastries also looked amazing, but I can try those in the days to come. For today, I relished the pho/pain au chocolat combination - one of the benefits of French imperialism, I guess!

Body image

Upon arriving to today's factory near Ho Chi Minh City, the production manager proclaimed, "You are a big man!" Every single time I go to Asia, people comment on my body. It's so uncomfortable, especially in a business setting!

This factory's senior management team is Korean, while all the middle managers and workers are Vietnamese. The Koreans are mostly expats on assignment, so there's a management dorm where they live, and it was in the dorm where we gathered for lunch.

Again, the production manager felt compelled to discuss what I look like, so he turned to me and said, "I like your body. I want my body to look like yours for the ladies. Are you married?"

I said I was not married, and he gestured across the table to the Vietnamese HR manager with the horrible teeth and said, "Cindy is not married either!"

::nervous giggles::

Like a prayer

On our way back to the hotel after visiting a dyeing facility today, the Indonesian social compliance auditor said, "Excuse me if I don't answer your questions. I am praying."

Several minutes later, when he was done praying, he said, "For Muslims, you can pray anywhere if it is an emergency." Apparently, it was an emergency because he was unable to pray during the noon hour, as expected. Since he was leading our audit today during the prayer hour, I guess he had to make up for it in the car!

Movie note: Unstoppable

THREE STARS

That guy from My Name Is Earl sure is a jackass.

So, this is what good looks like

The first factory we visited yesterday in Indonesia was one of the best I've seen from a corporate social responsibility perspective. The factory managing director was eager to share with me some of the community investment work it has implemented, some at the behest of another customer, but others that it initiated to fulfill business and community needs it identified. Some of the highlights to me included the following practices:

CNG Power - Apparently, Indonesia sits on a huge pool of natural gas, so this factory converted its power supply to compressed natural gas. The factory has realized tremendous cost savings due to this transition and mentioned that the amount saved was so significant that they could not reveal how much it was!

Wastewater Treatment - Years ago, the factory realized it was having a negative impact on the environment when blue geese were appearing nearby, due to the dyestuff in its effluent. Since then, the factory invested in an on-site wastewater treatment facility that ensures all effluent is free of chemicals and harmful dyes.

Infant Mortality Campaign - Apparently, the region where this factory is located has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the country. Factory management found that some women workers would get pregnant, go on maternity leave and their babies would die. The women would suffer from extreme emotional devastation, return to work once their maternity leave was finished, then immediately try to get pregnant again, resulting in less productive workers and the potential of another few months out of the office. To combat this, the factory has embarked on an extensive infant mortality campaign, that includes not only education, but also training and nominating capable midwives for factory workers. The factory has seen great success in reducing workers' infant mortality rates, and continues to find benefit from this investment.

Community Health Clinic - After the factory realized workers would take time off to care for their sick husbands and family, it invested in a community health clinic that provides healthcare services at a substantially reduced cost. The clinic is used by factory workers, their families and others in the nearby community - a visible symbol of the factory's commitment to the community.

Outreach to NGOs - One of the most surprising initiatives is the factory's proactive outreach to local, national and international non-governmental organizations. It's tough to get large multi-national corporations to understand the potential benefits of partnering with NGOs, but this one factory already has seen the power of learning from civil society organizations.

There were some other initiatives that puts this factory among "best in class" in my mind, but what I was most impressed by was the factory manager's attitude toward these initiatives. She understood both the business and social/environmental benefits of these programs, realized where her team did not have expertise so brought in the right community partners and eagerly searched for additional ways the factory could support its workers and community.

If only more factories took this approach, I might be out of a job! But the world would be a better place.

Movie note: Alice in Wonderland

TWO STARS

Apparently, it's "Underland." Also known as "Boringland."

Fast food world

One of the things I enjoy most about traveling is sampling the local cuisine. I can't help it - I'm an eater.

This morning, after enjoying the hotel breakfast buffet, we traveled for three hours to visit a "nearby" factory. After our tour of the facilities, lunch arrived. I've had some spectacular lunches during factory visits, both at nearby restaurants or on-site. Today, however, was the first time I was given fast food!

Our lunch came from Pizza Hut and consisted of two small pizzas with chicken, some garlic bread and some chicken wings. It was pretty consistent with the Pizza Hut from home, but I didn't try the wings. I'm not sure if the factory thought this would help me feel at "home" (where I don't eat Pizza Hut) or if it was simply what they ordered on a regular basis, but in either case, I was kind of bummed.

Driving back to the hotel, I noticed a McDonalds billboard that advertised a "Prosperity Burger" and made a point of noting that it was "BEEF!" It also displayed the number one could call for "McDelivery." I guess I'm grateful we had pizza rather than a McSpaghetti for lunch.

Sloth and gluttony

Door-to-door, my trip from Boston to Jakarta took roughly 30 hours. And most of those hours were spent lying down and eating. I have barely stood up, let alone walk around, and I basically ate at every opportunity. I ate in the lounges in both New York and Hong Kong, I ate on every single plane, and I'm even contemplating eating the orange on my hotel room desk!

I'm grateful that my company still allows us to fly business class for these long-haul flights. And I'm grateful that Cathay Pacific has those pod-like business class seats. But seriously, I think I may have developed bed sores. And gained 30 el-beez.

Movie note: The Social Network

FOUR STARS

This movie almost makes me want to delete my facebook page, then follow in Zuckerberg's footsteps by moving to the Bay Area from Boston.

Movie note: Morning Glory

THREE STARS

Why on earth would you name a television network "IBS"? Also, Harrison Ford makes a terrible newscaster.

Movie note: The King's Speech

FOUR STARS

I can only imagine what poor Bertie's life might have been like were there tabloids and paparazzi. This movie has piqued my curiosity about his older brother's life.

Reunited and it feels so good

Last week, while in New York for work, I had the chance to meet up with VALedictorian and SameBrain for dinner one night. We think it's been about a decade since the three of us were last together. Certainly, we've seen each other one-on-one when we travel to each others' cities, but it goes to show how quickly we move about.

At SameBrain's suggestion, we went to a very yummy tapas restaurant and ordered all the items that sounded a bit outrageous: squid ribbons, blood sausage bundles and a rich foie gras were just the start.

But once dinner was finished, we decided we couldn't simply return home (even though I promised myself that I would) so we headed out to a nearby bar where I was introduced to Patron Cafe, a new liqueur that may be my favorite.

Our conversation ranged from careers, to relationships, to the goings-on of our high school classmates. It was really nice to be together once again - even just for one night.

You put the dim in dim sum

Last night, I had dinner with a number of my company's executives and one of them had never heard of dim sum when it came up in conversation. After I and our CIO explained the concept to her, she replied, "Where I come from, I think we call that a pu pu platter."

Disco office

On Monday, I had a meeting with a prospective vendor in midtown New York City. The office was in a typical office building that didn't seem very special ... except that it used to be Studio 54!

So strange to think that cracked-out celebrities danced the night away in the same place where I was discussing how we could better protect human rights in developing countries.

Movie note: Love and Other Drugs

THREE STARS

Nudity! Is it just me, or did the brothers depicted in this movie have an unusual relationship?