The Patridge family

I'm dismayed at television for giving Audrina Patridge, the least interesting girl on The Hills (except for Stephanie), her own reality show. Of course, I checked out the first episode and I'm glad I did for two reasons:

1. I have now been introduced to Audrina's mom, the perennially tanked leather bag who acts more like a wronged teenager than a mother.

2. I'm 98% sure the opening song has the lyrics, "Ooooohhh ... I sharted."

It's all very appropriate.

When the beat goes boom

I'm very busy catching up on the television shows I missed while traveling in Asia, and at the top of my list is All About Aubrey on Oxygen. When Ms. O'Day made her debut years ago on Making the Band, I became instantly intrigued by her, the obvious star of the show.

And as a member of Danity Kane, Aubrey still kept my attention, even though I started to relate better to some of the other girls who were more down-to-earth. Still, Aubrey's sass was interesting and kept my attention. Hell, I even bought her issue of Playboy!

So, as she tries to make a comeback, I am interested to see how Aubrey's journey continues. This show, however, is a hot mess. There are so many contrived situations, her makeup and clothing are ridiculous and her "friends" are horrible. I enjoy the parts where she's rehearsing, in the studio and generally doing her music thing, but I could definitely do without the rest of it.

T-shirt tiiiiiiiiiiiiiime

Since I didn't have work today (Happy birthday, Mr. President!), it seemed like a good idea to go out on a Sunday night. Puppy and I met DJ Mother Nature and one of his Brazilian friends at the cabaret lounge act that DJ Mother Nature supports every week. It was the usual: bald man singing standards and making terrible jokes, us drinking beverages and giggling at the other patrons.

Fortunately, a "one time only" gay disco was happening upstairs, so DJ Mother Nature and I decided to check it out. It was my first "dance dance dance all night" type of event since moving to Boston, so I was interested to see what it would be like.

The space was pretty neat, and the DJ was one of my favorites, so I had high hopes. It quickly filled up, but one thing I noticed was that the clientele leaned more toward Jersey Shore reject than circuit queen. Maybe I've just been out of the scene for so long, but I really didn't expect to see so many horrible Affliction t-shirts!

The party's theme was "Miami" or something equally nonsensical, and there was a fat Samoan aerialist who was twisting and turning, while suspended from the ceiling on a piece of purple fabric. He reminded me of the homeless Samoan guy who hangs out on Castro Street in San Francisco - only this guy was wearing much less clothing. Not necessarily a good thing.

Other entertainment included four guys in ill-fitting wetsuits with electronic piping. I think it was supposed to reference TRON, but it just looked kind of looney.

Overall, the music was good and it was relatively easy to get drinks, so that was nice. I think I only saw one crazily wild-eyed nutjob, but all the gorilla juiceheads were too much! And strangely, only a handful of people took off their shirts, even when the dancefloor got crazy-crowded.

I decided to leave early because I got bored and didn't want to be stuck in the coat check line when it shut down, so maybe things took a turn for the better after I left at 1am, but I'm not so sure.

Why do you go by Mr. Rings?

Robyn's opening act was a tall, skinny blonde boy from Toronto with the stage name Diamond Rings. I'd recently read a favorable review of his music, but I didn't make the connection until he actually took the stage.

He put on a pretty good performance and has a surprisingly low voice for a kid who wore stretchy gold pants and blue eye shadow! Afterward, he stood by his merchandise table, waiting to engage fans and to sign posters. After the three or so people approached him, professed their admiration and took photos with the young man (including DJ Mother Nature), he just stood there by himself, so I figured I should talk to him.

Turns out his name is John and the Diamond Rings monicker has something to do with the Toronto Blue Jays. I asked him why he went by the name "Mr. Rings," which didn't seem to go over so well. And when he described an upcoming music video that features him in drag, gobbling a pizza, I suggested he should have been eating poutine.

After entertaining a few more of my ludicrous questions, he excused himself politely to "get a lamp" for his table. We thought he was just exiting the conversation, but minutes later, he did return with a lamp!

Stilettos and broken bottles

Last night, Puppy, DJ Mother Nature and I stuffed our faces with Mexican food and went to see Robyn perform at the House of Blues. As a teen, I did enjoy the catchy "Show Me Love" of which she is probably horridly embarrased.

She put on a great show - jumping around and flailing her arms about frenetically. And all while wearing some Timberlands with three-inch platforms! She is a truly small little pixie!

And for me, it was notable that I ran into two whole people that I knew!

The name game

On my way to work this morning, I was listening to a story on NPR about Taylor Swift and her tweeting. One of the commentators was an expert in social media. A professor at a university named ... Pinky Gonzales!

Imagine my surprise when Pinky began commenting on the story and turned out to be ... a man!

I want your ugly, I want your disease

For Puppy's birthday, we went to see Lady Gaga last night. This tour, unlike her last, was in arenas, with tons more fans. And strangely, the audience for this tour seemed filled with little teenyboppers and I felt like the oldest non-parent in the audience.

Like the last time, Lady Gaga put on a very good show, but it didn't seem quite as creative as the last tour. She didn't re-interpret any of her songs and the whole production seemed more like a scripted show than a from-the-heart expression of emotion.

Nevertheless, it was a good time and a fun show.

Istanbul (not Constantinople)

After a very long day of traveling, including a miserable four-plus hour layover in Paris, I've arrived in Istanbul, a city I know very little about. So far, I've spent a lot of time stuck in traffic and discussing work-type things with people and sadly, I don't think there is much sightseeing in the cards.

In the car from the airport, our Chief Supply Chain Officer asked if anyone knew Istanbul's former name. And I blurted out "Constantinople!" I guess I learned something from They Might Be Giants after, all.

Now I know how Joan of Arc felt

I just had a great session at the gym, not because my workout was particularly great, but because they played "Bigmouth Strikes Again!" I seriously got so excited and I'm digging out my Smiths CDs to burn to my iPod. I can't believe I haven't already done that...

And furthermore, the song came on between "Rhythm Is a Dancer" by Snap! and "Destroy Everything You Touch" by Ladytron. Good job, gym DJ.

Celeb sighting: Not the president

Last night, Puppy, his friend DJ Mother Nature and I enjoyed a summery dinner at home then visited a lounge to heckle DJ Mother Nature's friend who was singing standards.

Like last Sunday night's adventures, this lounge was also adjacent to the local Courtyard Marriott (I don't get it either) and we had a prime seat for the show since there were approximately five others in the audience.

During one of the breaks, people began filing out of the venue next door, where apparently another event was taking place - one where attendees got to wear name badges with flashing lights. And one of the attendees happened to be John Kerry! Our little lounge was abuzz and an old man trotted up to our table next to the window to get a better look. Sadly, I got a better look at his belly as he stood over me.

And it takes my breath away

It's a gorgeous day in Massachusetts today - 70 degrees, sunny and blue! My boss told me not to come into the office today after my travels, and I decided to follow his orders. I have, however, been awake since 4:30am and I've busied myself with errands, a conference call and some work.

During my errand-running, I heard the following song twice in my car:
Shocker of shocks, I love it!

Selena Gomez is my favorite of the current generation of Mickey Mouse pop princesses, much prettier and infinitely more talented than that Miley Cyrus. And I still don't understand what a Demi Lovato is, really. Plus, she's pretty funny on Wizards of Waverly Place. Yes, I've seen several episodes of that show.

I hear "baby," "crazy," "bad boy, "butterfly" and "elastic"

Whenever I travel to other countries, I like to spend some time with local pop culture, by way of MTV.

MTV China has been playing the video below over and over again and I find it pretty irritating for several million reasons. I love that the song is punctuated by English phrases and words like "so elastic" and "butterfly." It's also nice to see that the auto-tune has made it to Asia!I may also adorn a blazer with ruffles and/or feathers when I return to the states.

I'll be your teacher, I'll show you the ropes

There's something super catchy and poppy about this song that I love!

I'm bluffin' with my muffin

You guys, Lady Gaga puts on a pretty amazing show!

Last night I met up with Mattress, Beetle, Roommates A&J, Mahogany Sparkle, Lucy Ricardo and a few others to see Ms. Gaga's second San Francisco show. The venue was pretty intimate - in fact, I was there last week serving lunch to the city's homeless - and it was packed.

There were tons of kids in crazy costumes, some pretty fantastic, but most pretty tragic. Others, who looked like their little girlfriends dragged them to the show, were in pretty boring outfits and many were dressed in-between. As for myself, Mahogany Sparkle described my outfit as "lumber-jill," which seemed kind of appropriate.

As much as I enjoy Lady Gaga's songs, I'm by no means her biggest fan. After last night's show, however, I think I may be a convert. In addition to her crazy costumes and fun choreography, she has a remarkably good voice, as evidenced by her a capella moments that reminded me of Tori Amos (I think it was the piano.).

And by the end of her two-hour set, we were all frantically jumping up and down, screaming the lyrics to "Bad Romance" along with the entire audience - acting crazy and loving every second. Definitely a great performance - one of the best shows I've attended!

Hands off the back button

In my cab ride to Policy Wonkette's house this evening, I was blessed with a cab driver who not only didn't know the way, but also played the same, terrible song five times in a row! I wish I had shazamed it so I could let the Internets know what song it was, but trust me when I say it was horrible and it had a lot of "sha la la la la" in it.

O holy nigh...zzzzzzzzzzz...

Since it's December, I suppose 'tis the season. I also kind of like Christmas carols since they get me all excited for Christmas and make me think of fun times as a kid. But come on! I really don't think Christmas music is the right music to play at a gym. I'm not so inspired to work out to "pa rum pa pum pum..."

We are golden

Puppy and I made our way across the bay to see Mika in concert last night. The venue was intimate and interesting (gold buddha statues with scary glowing eyes) and packed with gays and girls.

The concert began with Mika's bandmates watching television - something about a space journey gone wrong. And Mika walked across the stage in a spacesuit before ripping it off and exposing himself before changing into a stripey-checkerboard suit for the opening song, "Relax."

It was s short, but really energetic and fun concert. Despite having broken himself the night before, Mika managed to dance and jump around in a bejeweled air cast and encouraged the audience to do the same. For "Love Today," he had everyone closing their eyes and jumping up and down, which was pretty neat.

I also especially enjoyed his backup singer who was this lovely Asian lady with a shock of bright pink hair. Her shimmying around was fun and made me covet her job.

Hands touching hands

Another great moment from Glee!

No day but today

Last night, Puppy treated me to a viewing of Rent, featuring the Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp in the roles they originated on Broadway and reprised in the recent movie. I'd only seen Rent live once, probably nearly 10 years ago in DC, but I'm intimately familiar with the music from hearing it throughout my college dorm experience and from the movie, which I really enjoyed (I think I may have been one of a dozen who enjoyed it!).

It was interesting to see this show so soon after seeing Wicked again, and it reminded me what an excellent, engaging show can be like. Rent is really a far superior show, with well-written lyrics and very hummable music.

It really is a much better show to see live and made me realize that the movie doesn't even come close to capturing the energy and urgency of the live production. And the audience was very excited for the show. There were tons of kids who clapped along to the music and cheered loudly (and annoyingly) and there were many audience members of an older generation who probably experienced firsthand the sense of loss, love and life depicted in the show. I'm sure Puppy wasn't the only one in the audience who'd seen the show more than five times!

The two leads, unfortunately, haven't really held up as well. As Roger, Adam Pascal seemed totally robotic. Like he was going through the motions and a bit resentful that he's doing the same show he was known for nearly 15 years ago. Anthony Rapp's Mark was much more alive and his voice seems to have held up better, but the glaring bald spot on the back of his head belied his age. Basically, you have two men pushing 40, straining to act like they're in their early 20s.

Nevertheless, it was a very good show and now I have songs from it in my head!

'Til now, I always got by on my own

I think I had a big, dumb grin on my face throughout the entirety of last night's episode of Glee! Kristin Chenoweth! Singing Heart! It was almost too much to handle.
I think Cheyenne Jackson would make a great guest star...