Farewell, Flora

On my way to work yesterday, I noticed that the "check engine" light was illuminated on my car. And after last week's fiasco with the tire, I figured it was time to think about a new car. And now was as good a time as any since I hadn't yet registered Flora the Explorer in Massachusetts yet - another fee, for sure.

Twelve years ago, after a long day of car shopping with my pops, I brought Flora home and committed to a snappy green Ford Explorer Sport. Later that summer, Flora joined me in Washington DC, where she basically sat in a garage for several years. She would take me to swim practice a few times a week, but otherwise, I didn't do much driving.

Four years later, Flora took me cross-country back to California in a three-day zip across America. And for two years, Flora took me to grad school every day as I pursued a more marketable degree.

Then for six years, Flora basically sat on the street, moving occasionally to avoid street cleaning tickets and taking me to my parents' house from time to time. In San Francisco, I really didn't need a car, but I kept Flora anyway.

So, it wasn't very surprising when folks at the car dealership were shocked at how low Flora's mileage was. Sadly, it didn't help much in increasing her value when I traded her in yesterday. Adios, trusty gal!

Movie note: Young Frankenstein

FOUR STARS

Not as funny as I remember, but still a classic! I miss Madeline Kahn.

Thanksgiving in April

Our company cafe has decided to offer daily special sandwiches of the "gourmet" variety. Today, Wednesday, I decided to opt for the special - something called "The Pilgrim."

I read over the description - turkey, blah, blah, cranberry, blah - quickly and ordered my lunch. When I returned to my desk, $6.30 poorer, I discovered that the sandwich had stuffing in it. Inside the sandwich! It's like the day after Thanksgiving, except in April!

Movie note: Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

TWO STARS

Quite possibly the dullest night in NYC ever committed to celluloid.

Play dates

Yesterday I visited Flabs, her husband and her two daughters (one of whom is a mere two weeks old!). All my friends in Boston seem to have kids, so instead of going out and carousing with my pals, I've been catching up during the day, when the kids are between naps.

We packed the car, went a few blocks away and ended up at a neighborhood playground, where toddlers ran amok, crawling all over the jungle gym, pushing cars around, throwing sand in the air and generally running around. Flabs and I basically sat on a bench and ate sandwiches, getting crumbs all over the new baby.

And later in the day, on my way home from the gym, I stopped by another playground where Reebs, her husband and their daughter were enjoying the great outdoors. Reebs was with several of her mommy friends and again, I watched toddlers run around, play on the monkey bars and scream at each other.

My life in Boston is very different than the life I led in San Francisco.

Enchilada fiesta

The other night, Puppy's friend Velma invited a bunch of folks over to enjoy his mother's enchilada feast. We traveled outside the city and ended up at their place, a beautiful condo that none of us could afford if it were in Boston.

It was a mellow night where we mostly ate a lot, sat on couches, looked at photos and played with the three chihuahuas.

One of Velma's friends brought a date - a skinny little 21-year-old who stayed silent throughout the night and went by the nickname "Tiger Lotus." That was weird.

Travel by train

This morning's commute finds me taking Amtrak's Acela train to New York for meetings. I've never taken a train out of Boston, so it was sort of confusing for me to arrivve at the station this morning. Company policy is for us to travel first class between Boston and New York, so of course I alighted the train at the wrong end and had to make my way through the entire thing to the first-class cabin, where I'm now comfortably seated, enjoying wi-fi and coffee and waiting for my apple stuffed pancakes!

Movie note: The Manchurian Candidate

THREE STARS

I haven't seen the original, so I don't know how this version compares, but it was kind of slow and Bill Cosby wasn't as compelling as he could have been.

Bad samaritan

Walking home from dinner, Puppy and I stopped at a red light and discussed the merits of the ice cream we'd just purchased. A few twenty-somethings rode their bikes through the intersection, turning in front of us and the last member of their group - a hipster-type wearing an ironic, old-fashioned style helmet - took a digger and spilled in the crosswalk. He picked his head up, looked shocked, and started to stand up.

Suddenly, a figure in a hoodie ran past us and approached the fallen bicyclist. We assumed it was a friend, arriving to help the hipster up, but instead of helping the guy, he ran up to him, slapped him in the face and started cackling!

Upon closer inspection, we saw that the slapper was a moderately homeless, pretty drunk kid and it was clear the two were not friends. Fallen bicyclist grabbed dirty slapper and started yelling, "What the fuck?! What the fuck?!"

Puppy and I just crossed the street and let our neighbors finish their business in the crosswalk.

Vehicular me-slaughter

Oh, how I long for the days of a simpler, non-car commute! Even though San Francisco's muni underground system is possibly the worst public transport system in our galaxy, I prefer being shuttled around to having to drive myself places.

This morning, I got up bright and early to head to work. When I stepped into the parking lot, I saw that my car seemed ... slanted. Well folks, I had a flat tire! Thanks a lot, Boston roads! So, I called AAA and waited two hours for them to arrive and get the spare on, causing me to miss a conference call and get to work a good 2+ hours later than originally planned.

And since I have a California license, California plates and California insurance, I figured I had to get my butt to the DMV (Why it's called the "RMV" here is anyone's guess.), which meant leaving work more than an hour early and standing in a depressing room amongst the finest citizens Braintree, MA has to offer for 1.5 hours.

Finally, I surrendered my CA license and will be on my way to becoming a Masshole. Sad.

Campus walking tour

It was a moderately rainy day in Boston yesterday, but I decided it would be nice to walk to visit Jillian and her delightful family in Cambridge yesterday. On my 35-minute trek, I went through three college areas and passed students who accurately reflected my stereotypes of each.

My home is situated near Northeastern's campus, with it's all-American, Bostonian types. But as I headed north, I found myself surrounded by the artsy-fartsy hipster population of Berklee College of Music. Finally, I crossed the Harvard Bridge and found myself amidst the smartypants technical students on MIT's campus.

Having attended undergrad at a university that's not situated in a city, I wonder what life would have been like in a college campus where "real people" would walk through. I think I prefer my own college experience where we were sequestered from reality and didn't have to deal with interlopers who were traversing the streets to see their friends across the river.

Movie note: L.I.E.

THREE STARS

I picture this to be what adolescence was like for the male castmembers of Jersey Shore.

Party like it's 1999

When Reebs and I lived together in Washington DC, we were often too poor and/or too lazy to go out on the town. A nice Friday night for us would find us on the couch or on one of our beds, sharing a bottle of wine and talking about the week's activities.

A decade later, it looks like we've fallen back into our old pattern. With her husband stranded in London due to a canceled flight, and since she cannot leave her two-year-old daughter alone, I went over to her house (a mere two blocks away), watched her put her kid to bed and we shared some wine and ordered Thai.

We enjoyed an order of gold bags, pad thai and green curry, sipped on some wine and shared our latest news. It was a lovely, low-key Friday night and now that we're neighbors, I'm sure we'll spend more time like it's the late '90s.

Ashes, no crashes

With many European airports closed indefinitely due to the little erupting Icelandic volcano, it looks like I'm grounded for the week. Originally, I was to fly to Istanbul (by way of Paris) tomorrow, travel to Amman, then wrap up in Casablanca before returning home next Saturday. We've made the decision to postpone this jaunt, so I have two weekends back to myself!

I am looking forward to getting settled, visiting the cleaners and figuring out where to get a haircut!

Back in the saddle

After work yesterday, I had an appointment with a "membership advisor" at my local up-scale gym. Like other gyms in this chain, it's clean, equipped with fancy grooming products and has amenities like expensive spa treatments.

I went intending to do a trial and taking advantage of other trial memberships at other neighborhood gyms.

But once I arrived, I decided just to join on the spot. Who am I kidding? I had no intention of joining another gym and I didn't have the energy to pretend.

I may have failed at my plan to play "hard ball" with the gym folks, but I just hope to get my flabby ass back in shape!

Movie note: Sherrybaby

FOUR STARS

Good, but tough to watch at times. Excellent use of "Eternal Flame," by the Bangles.

A new flueflenhaaguuf

Puppy and I made a trip to IKEA yesterday - an activity one should have to do only once in a lifetime. IKEA, for all its lovely inexpensive prices, is a terrible shopping experience, especially on Sundays.

We made our way through the maze of fake rooms, fought our way through crowds of slow, fatty suburbanites and screaming kids and tried to pick out some decent furniture for our new home. We ended up getting a rutbo, a couple of jonsbo grybys, a pax/komplement combination, a galant, an allak, a lack and several other odds and ends I can't remember.

To say the least, it was challenging loading everything up on the little cart and balancing it to the checkout finish line. And once we paid for everything, we had to wait an additional half-hour to schedule delivery. So much wasted time, such an annoying shopping experience.

Movie note: Surrogates

THREE STARS

I loved when Bruce Willis was Teddy from 90210! Also, I think a kid I went to college with was in this movie.

Movie note: Doubt

FIVE STARS

Maybe this is why my dad didn't want to raise us in the Catholic church!

Move it in

All my stuff arrived in Boston from San Francisco today. And like the move-out day, today was a gloomy, rainy day. I'll try not to take the weather on both moving days as a sign.

It was a relatively easy move, and three large, football-loving movers helped get me settled. The spent their time talking about the Patriots (One even had a tattoo of the team logo on his arm!), bad-mouthing the SF-based crew that packed my stuff up and warning me to be careful walking in the neighborhood at night. Welcome!

Now the new place is filled with boxes and the real work for Puppy and me begins. Sadly, the person who's responsible for assembling the very tricky media center is not available until tomorrow, so I can't yet set up my beloved television. So, it's one last night in Hingham corporate housing!

It also took me an hour to drive the 0.7 miles from the new apartment to the freeway. This better not be typical, because it's my new commute!

Your work is shear genius

Last night, Roommate J forced me to watch the finale of Shear Genius - a show I'd never watched before, save for one episode when nothing else was on. It's a concept I can't really get into, probably because my haircuts cost less than $20. All the talk about "polished" hair and "setting" is beyond me, so I can't appreciate any of the "skills" the contestants bring to the contest.

What I can appreciate, however, is the host's lovely Latin accent, which, thanks again to Roommate J, has introduced some key phrases into my lexicon:

"And Stalins, remember: Hair is imported!"

"Juan by Juan, the Stalins were illuminated."

"Yur werk is shir ginyiss!"

Movie note: The OH in Ohio

ONE STAR

Surprisingly, not all movies with Danny De Vito and Liza Minelli in them are good.

Opening night

It used to be that I'd get all excited for a new bar opening or I'd try to score a table at some hot new restaurant. Alas, those days appear to be behind me.

For lunch today, I went to a new grocery store with a few co-workers. It was such a big deal for this sleepy little town and everyone who's anyone was there today! Granted, it's one of those fancy shmancy deals with lots of prepared foods, nice wood floors and elevated price points, but it's still a grocery store.

It was the usual to-do, with free samples and confused workers, but the most interesting part for me was the ground pork in the butcher section. They'd fashioned the ground pork to look like a pig's head, complete with cherry tomato eyes, a snout and a smile! Gnarly.

Movie note: S. Darko

TWO STARS

Just because it doesn't make sense, doesn't mean it's a worthy successor to Donnie Darko!

Even though I'm neither mother nor logical

Recently, I've been reading a lot of articles on www.momlogic.com. My fascination with this website began innocently enough: TurboBoob is a featured writer for the site and I liked keeping up with her adventures as a young, new mother.

But I've found that the site is filled with very interesting content, besides my beloved TurboBoob's writings. Basically, the site seems to take news from other sources and filter it through a "mom" lens. What would a mother think about Tiger Woods and his mistresses? Find out on momlogic.com! Want to consider the recent Mexican earthquake from a mom's perspective? You know where to go!

But if you take a sampling of sensational "articles" on the site today, you start to realize it's really US Weekly in disguise:

* I Met My Husband on a Website for Cheaters

* Top 10 Reasons We Want Beyonce to Get Pregnant

* How Tiger's Apology Expedited My Divorce

And my personal favorite:

* A Gallery of Slutty Prom Dresses

I mean, how could you not get sucked in?

Movie note: Heavenly Creatures

FOUR STARS

In which our naughty heroines indulge in a rich fantasy life fashioned in claymation.

Movie note: Coco Before Chanel

THREE STARS

AKA, how a sullen orphan girl slept her way to fame and fortune.

Celeb sighting: Hoarders

When Puppy and I looked at our new apartment, I realized I'd seen the building on an episode of Hoarders before. And yesterday, when I took Reebs to see the new place, I saw the hoarder, himself!

Dale was in front of the building, carefully laying out many of his belongings, for what looked like a sidewalk sale. I guess the therapy is working and he continues to get rid of his worthless stuff! Hopefully, he's cured and I won't be living with a hoarder anymore.

Dessert

Victor Kiriakis is currently hunting a ladybug and trying to eat it. It keeps flying out of his mouth.

Movie note: Happy-Go-Lucky

THREE STARS

The characters in this movie about nothing are all bonkers.

Sun-soaked South End Saturday

It was a glorious day in the greater Boston area today - beautifully sunny and hot! Reebs and I met near her house in the South End and we enjoyed a nice two-drink lunch outside. I showed her my new apartment and we walked around, catching up and getting ice cream (raspberry chip for me, coffee chip for her).

She warned me that this weather cannot last, and that the Northeast springtime is notoriously fickle. Despite how amazing the day, I guess I should still brace myself for rain and even snow!

Traumatized and lonely

Poor Victor Kiriakis still hasn't gotten over his cross-country adventure, it seems. Each day when I return to work, I find him under one of the beds, possibly just waking up. I wonder if he spends the entire day under a bed while I'm gone.

And when I'm home, he follows me around and meows the entire time. The strangest behavior is that his little front paws don't stop moving. Even when he's sitting still, his little paws knead and knead whatever's nearest: the ground, the wall, the couch, my belly, etc.

Hopefully, he'll snap out of this funk ... just in time to move into the city!

Go ahead and e-mail my pink slip

If I were smart, I'd stay off the company e-mail for a while. Within the last week, some of my electronic missives have made their way into the hands of our executive team, effectively pissing off our Chief Creative Officer and our General Counsel.

I've never met either man and now I've received terse, stern messages from each. Way to start off on the right foot!

Movie note: Battlestar Galactica: The Plan

ONE STAR

Oh my gods this movie was so boring.