Leisure lundi

Internets, I could get used to enjoying time off. I had such a lovely day, not worrying about work or having to be anywhere and just enjoying some time to myself.

I had a good workout and relished in the fact that no one was really at the gym at the civilized hour of 11:00am. I thought about going for a swim, but I realized that a class was being taught in the pool. More interestingly, when I saw the instructor's name, I realized it was a girl I'd swum with in college. For one year, anyway. Then she transferred to another school for the remainder of her undergraduate time. She was kind of a wacko and lived off-campus with her husband (yes, at 18 years old - I don't think anyone knew she was married) and told stories about driving across the country while tripping on acid. A quality gal, indeed.

After the gym, I went to the Mission, sat in the sun and had my favorite seafood salad in the city for lunch. I did laundry, ran some errands, then realized it was time to head to the East Bay for dinner with Shotgun and Franny, who's in town for a brief visit from Berlin.

Shotgun made a delicious dinner of skirt steak with a cilantro dipping sauce and a nice green salad. For dessert, she made homemade honey ice cream and roasted some figs and raspberries together. It was pretty amazing. It was great catching up with Franny, Shotgun and her husband. And Shotgun's newest baby is so adorable! As an added bonus, we sat around and watched some of the US Olympic Swim Trials, which caused us to all reminisce about days gone by when we actually swam in competitions.

Priding it up: day 3

The 2008 Pride festivities are officially dunzo and, in hindsight, it was a pretty mellow pride for this panda. Yesterday started off a bit chilly, but fortunately warmed up just as Chocolate Thunder and I made our way to Civic Center plaza for the festivities. It's sort of the same every year - thousands of obnoxious, drunk out-of-towners, companies sponsoring booths and trying to capture "share of wallet" from the gays, stages playing dancey remixes of popular tunes, political speeches promoting equal rights and long lines waiting to get at some chicken on a stick.

We made our way through the festival pretty quickly, then met up with Dyson, GarGar, Roommate J and Selives apart from the crowds. We remarked on the "fashion" choices of the gays - from wearing nothing at all to wearing a whole lot of look! Selives was concerned that someone had spilled on his jeans, Roommate A wanted to change once his volunteer shift at the margarita booth was over and I wanted to grab another layer, so we split up and headed home for a few moments.

I met up with Puppy and we headed over to Juanita MORE's pool party, which was packed full of trannies, drag queens, hipsters, go-go boys and girls and other misfits. What set the party apart from others in my mind was the entertainment. The Chipman Middle School Cougar Cadet Corps was invited to showcase their drumline abilities! It was totes adorable - all these little talented kids drumming their hearts out (but strangely wearing scowls on their faces) - and totally rocking the crowd. ChickenHawk tried to claim credit for bringing them to the party, but I never really followed his argument. Something about a donation he made.

As the party winded down, Roommates A&J, Dyson and I headed to Dyson's to recover for a bit before heading to Big Top, where I stayed for only a few moments. Surprisingly, I was home by 10:30pm and I picked up a pint of ice cream from the two block walk between the bar and my apartment. Happy Pride!

Priding it up: day 2

I woke up this morning with chocolate under my fingernails. Apparently, I made my way though the Pink Saturday party in the Castro while stuffing my face with a double chocolate cookie last night. I'm sure I must have been a sight to behold: a drunk panda wearing suspendered pants, stumbling through the street and inhaling a cookie!

The details of Saturday evening are pretty fuzzy, thanks to an afternoon pool party in my backyard. A bar had decided to sponsor a pool party and I was the beneficiary of free-flowing alcohol and party guests whose bodies revealed that they clearly don't indulge in ice cream as much as I do.

Needless to say, after the party I was pretty tipsy so when I met up with Roommates A&J, Mattress and Selives in the Castro, I was already in rare form. So rare, in fact, that I passed out by 10 o'clock last night!

You got me begging

Besides "Damaged", the other song that really gets me going these days is "Mercy" by Duffy. Roommate J doesn't appreciate it because he thinks it's an Amy Winehouse knock-off, but I love it and think she's much cuter than Ms. Winehouse.

Priding it up: day 1

Pride weekend exploded yesterday and the gays were certainly in a festive mood, even if the weather wasn't cooperating. I headed into the Castro yesterday evening and noticed that most of the homos had been liberally partaking in happy hour festivities. These gays were serious about getting their pride on and in a mood to party!

I went to the Bar with Roommates A&J and luckily walked in as DJ Zax played "Damaged"! Of course, Roommate J was in mid-text to let me know that the DJ was spinning my tune. It was super-crowded and poor Beetle was frantically slinging drinks to all the merry-makers. And interestingly, a liquor company sponsored some sort of promotion that involved packets of pop rocks. I'd forgotten how that crackling sensation in your mouth could be so fun!

After an hour at the cramped bar, we headed to a new establishment outside of the Castro. Chocolate Thunder has just moved to SF so he picked us up in his cab and we met up with Dyson, GarGar, Mattress and Dealia Roberts at the new bar. As we walked in, PorkChop was leaving with friends and warned us that the bar did not serve liquor! Only beer and wine. And let me tell you the patrons were not happy.

So we quickly left and went to Joshua J's pride kick-off party, Mr., where approximately 20 people were enjoying artwork and cheese. And a cash bar. Over time, however, the party picked up and the gays packed it in. The DJ played "Damaged" and GarGar and I scored new pairs of jeans. Apparently, Levi's sponsored the party so now I've got a pair of jeans ... that I cannot wear to work! GarGar immediately changed into his new pair and rocked his red jeans for the rest of the night.

Oh, and my jeans are a bit snug. I've got to lay off the carbs and get back to the gym!

Last day

Today's my last day at The Corporation and I have to admit that it feels very bittersweet to be leaving after four years. I've had a good run here and there certainly are a number of things I'll miss:

* Tater tots in the cafeteria every morning
* The Richard Serra sculpture in the lobby
* Having people recognize the company I work for
* All the amazing artwork in the galleries
* Wearing jeans and sneakers to work
* My company discounts
* The view of the bay
* Travel to exotic locales
* All my fantastic co-workers

I've got a bunch of stuff to wrap up and people to say farewell to, so I'd best get to it!

Ages of pride

The pride parties continue! Last night, Blanca, Roommates A&J and I hit two very different pride kick-off events.

First up was a party hosted by Kimpton Hotels, where I'm pretty sure we were some of the youngest party-goers in attendance. We were surprised to find a cash bar and a buffet table of carbs! The DJ played gay anthems from the early '90s and a very loud drag queen tried to get everyone to sing some sort of obnoxious song. We quickly downed our two drinks (we'd been bamboozled into buying drink tickets) and exited pride-fest circa 1995.

After a pit-stop at Jack in the Box, we hit the pride party at the Diesel store downtown. Unlike the Kimpton party, we felt like the oldest patrons in attendance! Fortunately, the bar was open, the hors d'oeuvres were tastier and the music was more contemporary. The DJ even played "Damaged" at my request, resulting in a bunch of gays and girls jumping up and down and squealing. Prec was at the Diesel party, but he was saving up his drinking and energy for the weekend. Meanwhile, GarGar and Dyson arrived just as we left to go to the bar.

After the past two nights, I'm not sure how I can pride it up for the rest of the weekend!

Pre-pride party

The 2008 pride season has officially kicked off! Last night Puppy and I attended a cocktail party hosted by PINK magazine that featured an open bar, some hors d'oeuvres, an ice sculpture of the Golden Gate Bridge, far too many homos for the restaurant to hold, a be-pinked drag queen whose wig resembled cotton candy, paparazzi and gift bags! Everyone was dressed to the nines, and I used the occasion to wear a smart looking tie and vest combo out.

Sadly, the party was sponsored by some sort of vodka that made every drink 10-times sweeter than it should have been, but I kept downing the drinks because they were ... free! A bunch of friends, including Dyson (whose outfit was eerily similar to mine), were there, but unfortunately, most of my friends either RSVP'ed too late or were denied admittance.

And since Puppy's tummy was acting up and since he had an unflatteringly early call this morning, he retired early as I continued to celebrate. Being a Wednesday night, I headed out to Juantia MORE's party where GarGar, Dyson and I took photos posed as fortune tellers. Let the Pride festivities begin!

Extra foamy

I was just at Starbucks where I witnessed the barista preparing a green tea latte in a ceramic mug. It was totally overflowing and gobs and gobs of greenish foam were dripping down the sides and it had spilled all over the counter top.

The barista must have registered the look on my face - the look that said, "That drink looks like a hot-ass mess!" - because he looked at me apologetically. When the customer took her beverage away, he wiped down the counter and whispered to me, "She like it like that! Can you believe? She like it like that! Foam!"

Round two

I had a minor heart attack yesterday when I received an email from the corporate recruiter at my new company. In the message, she said that my pre-employment screen results had come in and she asked me to call her.

After an hour of panic (My mind raced to think of anything that could have emerged through the screen, and it came up with excuses to address every possible scenario.), I bit the bullet and called the recruiter back. Well, it turns out that my drug test sample was indeed too diluted and did not yield any results. Thus, I needed to take the test again - within 24 hours.

The recruiter also warned me that two diluted samples counts as a failed test, so she warned me against hydrating too much. Instead, I was to find the balance that produced an adequate amount of urine, but that would be suitable for testing.

So this morning I made my way back to the little drug testing lab, sat in the grimy waiting room for 45 minutes, and submitted a sample. The lab technician assured me that the lab should be able to use this morning's sample, so I hope this testing boondoggle is dunzo.

Drunk dining

Despite my best efforts, I failed to stay sober for Puppy's dinner party last night. And I think I was that guest - the drunk and embarrassing one. Sad.

It all began when I met up with Speedy and his girlfriend for Mexican food before they caught their plane back to New York. Since we had some time to kill, we hit a bar and watched the Spain v. Italy soccer match while knocking back a few drinks. The bartender taught us all about drinking absinthe and the origin of the name "bloody mary" so it was quite an educational experience.

Then, after a bit of shopping, I met up with Blanca, PorkChop and ChickenHawk who were enjoying a few Sunday libations and jello shots. Of course, this panda couldn't control himself so I continued down the slippery slope toward drunkenness.

After that, I stopped by the Bar to see Beetle, Roommates A&J and Mahogany Sparkle where I indulged in yet another drink before heading to ThunderBoy's farewell happy hour. ThunderBoy, you see, is moving to Angola for his new job so I simply had to see him off!

Lo and behold, it was time for Puppy's dinner party so I grabbed a few jello shots as party favors and I headed to the wine vendor. I can only imagine what the salesperson thought when I entered his shop, picked out a bottle of pinot noir and tried my hardest to carry on a conversation without slurring. Did he notice the fistful of jello shots in my hand? Probably. Did he care? It didn't appear so in my drunken state.

Finally, I made it to Puppy's where the other dinner guests had assembled with glasses of wine. Puppy prepared a delicious feast and I think I managed to make it through the meal without spilling. Something to be proud of, indeed.

Weekend wedding

Yesterday I went up to Marin for Easy's wedding. It was a scorchingly hot day and I was sort of tempted to just stay put in the city and enjoy the scantily clad homos in the sun. But my better judgment kicked in and I drove up to the Marin Art and Garden Center for the festivities.

It was a gorgeous ceremony and it was so personal to the couple. One of their close friends officiated and their vows were very reflective of each other. It was also a great opportunity to see Speedy, who came from New York to attend the wedding and to see Easy's siblings, Granny and Rausch.

As all weddings should, Easy's wedding was stocked with all sorts of liquor (margaritas were the signature drink) and the food was delicious. Most impressive was the very nice cake - each tier was a different flavor! Personally, I enjoyed the chocolate section.

When the official wedding reception ended and everyone headed over to the "after-party," I drove back home so that I could resist the temptation of the drink. I'd remained a sober panda because the last thing I need right now is a DUI...

Kung fu panda

On the muni yesterday, a woman who was some combination of:

a) homeless
b) crazy
c) dirty
d) crackhead
e) smelly
f) republican

And she was seated across two seats. She looked at me and said, "Hey Bruce Lee, want a seat?" and gave me a little wink. I said that I was fine standing and she spent the rest of the ride rocking in place.

Please make your deposit in this cup

In order to be employed by my new company, I've had to fill out tons of paperwork and provide proof of my current and past employers. This has not been an easy task. After all, I haven't really kept W-2 forms from 5 or 10 years ago!

Today's pre-employment hoop was the drug test. In my employment packet, I received a form to take with me to a laboratory located in downtown San Francisco. I was instructed to submit a urine sample for testing within 24 hours after I received my forms, so I had to go sometime today.

The laboratory was located in a rather old building and I found myself seated in a squeaky pleather chair in a cramped waiting room. Also waiting for various tests were a large gay couple (Do they need blood tests for gay marriage?), a hefty limping man and a mother with her 1-year-old daughter (Perhaps they were there for a paternity test!).

In any case, it took 40 minutes before it was finally my turn to make my deposit and the lab technician was very clear with his instructions (Sign here, initial here, please verify your birth date, fill the cup above this line but below this line, do not flush the toilet when you are done!).

All in all, it took about five minutes for me to finish the process and when I handed over my little cup to the technician, he held it up and looked at me disapprovingly. "It's very clear," he said, "you may have to come back and submit another sample."

Apparently, it could be too diluted. I guess I hydrate too much!

Little boxes

Season 4 of Weeds started the other night! After last season's fiery cliffhanger, I wasn't sure what to expect, but I loved the season premiere. This show is pretty amazing, eliciting sympathy for a drug dealer who simply seems in over her head.

Mary Louise Parker is genius in this role and I'm excited to see where they take the storylines this year. Should be a bumpy ride...

New adventures

Well, I thought it over and have decided to accept the new job. Since beginning to let people at The Corporation know, I've received several punches in the arm (thanks, Gleemonex) and some very kind words from colleagues.

I've worked here for four years and I can honestly say that they've been good years of personal and professional growth. I truly believe in my team's work here and I will continue to be a loyal customer even after my employee discount ends next Friday.

As with any departure, leaving The Corporation is bittersweet. I'm excited about my new position, but I'll miss my friends, the relaxed corporate culture, the fun and interesting trips abroad and being part of such an exciting consumer-facing brand. Of course, I'll also miss my employee discount, but I'm hopeful that the benefits at my new company will outweigh what I'm leaving behind.

Butterfly in the sky

I just saw a yellow butterfly flapping around outside! It made me realize how rarely I see butterflies, one of Mariah Carey's preferred creatures. And while I find them lovely to look at, I would hate for one (or some) to alight on my face because after all, as BFJ well knows, they are insects. Dirty, creepy, crawly insects.

Now I have the theme to Reading Rainbow in my head.

Taco Tuesday

It's been a while since Kitten and I have hung out, so we decided to make today "Taco Tuesday" and meet for lunch at a mediocre Mexican restaurant. We each had some sort of taco for lunch, in addition to the other Mexican fixin's and we caught up on our lives.

As Kitten regaled me with stories of his shenanigans, I realized how out of the loop I've been. I guess all this traveling I've done recently has disconnected me from the SF scene and I'm woefully behind on all the gossip and the homo dramas. And although I miss hanging out with all my friends, I don't really miss the petty in-fighting. Can it be? Is this panda finally growing out of Junior High? Highly doubtful...

A magician with meat

You know how some movies seem so full of promise? They sport a cast where each actor's fairly evenly likeable and capable and the premise offers a bit of hope that it could be well-executed? Well, that's how Puppy and I felt when we stumbled upon the movie Mama's Boy with Jon Heder and Diane Keaton. Throw in Anna Faris, Sarah Chalke and even Jeff Daniels, it seemed like the movie would be worth our while. Neither of us could remember its release, which was an ominous portent, but we decided to order it after we stuffed our faces full of Thai food last night.

Well, internets, it was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Truly, truly horrendous. Even the lovely Diane Keaton could not make this monstrosity watchable. How can I get Puppy's $3.99 back?

Happy pop's day!

It's father's day so I'm about to head down to the 'burbs for family fun time. We're doing a potluck dinner at the grandparents' house so I'm going to help my mom create a lovely paella dish. I don't really know how I can contribute, but I'm gonna try!

No one's gonna stop me now

I love, love this song. It's definitely the best song of a rather lackluster album.

Thinking it over

So, for the past few weeks, I've been bamboozling The Corporation and going for little interviews at another company nearby. There have been days where I left my desk, returned home to change into a suit, went for a few interviews, changed back into my work drag, then returned to work - several hours after I left. And no one seemed to notice!

Well, several weeks later and nine interviews later, I have a job offer! I've been given the weekend to "think it over" since the new company would like a response by Monday.

Meanwhile, my boss at The Corporation resigned yesterday so things are already kind of in a flurry. I don't know what kinds of opportunities this might open up for me, but I think it may be time for me to move on. I shall continue thinking...

5. Wide awake...

Thanks to Recovery Monday, I have been introduced to Marguerite Perrin, apparently a star of Trading Spouses from several years back. How I've never known of this self-proclaimed "God warrior" who's fighting against all forces "dark-sided" before is beyond me. But she is a glorious caricature of close-minded holy rollers across this great nation of ours.

Her antics have been well documented and it's easy to derive both pleasure and hilarity from her behavior, but my favorite scene from the episode was when the new-agey mother tried to hypnotize Marguerite's daughter, Ashley.

At first, I wondered why she needed a microphone (and a script) to perform her hypnotism. But then it all became clear. The fun appears below, at 2:15...

This shouldn't hurt

Normally a trip to the dentist is no biggie for Panda!!!!, but this morning's trip has left me reeling a bit. Every time I go to the dentist, a new hygienist does the cleaning, then my dentist comes in to perform a final inspection. In the past, the hygienist has been a perky blonde whose friendly demeanor and gentle touch have helped to put me at ease, but today's cleaner was a curt lady who was all about business.

Unlike her predecessors, today's hygienist never explained the steps she was taking and was really rough with the scraper. Whereas in the past, I was chided by the hygienist for not flossing enough, this lady jabbed at my gums and scolded me, "This wouldn't be as uncomfortable if you flossed! You need to floss!" But you know what? I haven't changed my dental habits since my last visit and the pain last time wasn't as acute.

And during past visits, the hygienist didn't have to ask, "Are you okay?" multiple times. Nor did she put a pair of goggles over my eyes during the procedure. Nor did she lean her elbow on my nose as she reached across my face to get her dental instruments.

Finally, when the cleaning ended, it was time for my dentist to enter for his final examination. But instead, the dentist's partner came in! I inquired about my own dentist's whereabouts and he responded that he is potentially moving his practice to Sacramento so the partner was taking on all patients. You'd think a common courtesy would be to inform said patients. And while he poked around my mouth during the examination, he said, "This shouldn't hurt" because I think he could tell that I was a little shell-shocked from the poking I'd just received.

Orlan-dunzo

Roommates A&J and I were the last ones standing in Orlando this morning so we decided a sensible meal was in order before we ended our little vacay and head to the airport. Throughout my time in Orlando, I think I consumed approximately 4,387 chicken nuggets, 387 orders of fries, seventeen hamburgers and one side order of broccoli. Our food options in O-Town were pretty limited so my diet has resembled that of a fatty 8-year old whose parents have entrusted him with a blank check at McDonald's. Furthermore, I've exercised a grand total of zero times, thus ... I'm as big as a house!

So we opted to eat at a restaurant where chicken nuggets were decidedly not on the menu. And I smartly ordered a salad for my meal. We took some time to walk around the little shopping center at which we'd ended up. Roommate A purchased some litterature: the first Gossip Girl novel and we saw a building that was built to resemble a structure that had been upended and turned upside-down. It was one of the weirdest things I'd ever seen. It's like everything in Orlando has to compete with the Disney theme parks so they go over the top in their architecture.

And now, after two flights across the country, both of which featured babies who were screaming at the top of their lungs throughout, I'm finally back in San Francisco. My next flight is not until the end of next month, and for that I'm grateful. I'm excited to sleep in my own bed tonight! This panda is tired.

Recovery Monday

Mahogany Sparkle finally left today and the rest of us spent our last day in Orlando as lazy bums. We spent some time lying out by the pool before heading to Universal's Citywalk to catch the Sex and the City movie, which I thought was totes cute.

Afterward, we searched for someplace to eat, but apparently everything closes down early on Monday night so we ended up at Bubba Gump's where our very peppy waitress shared an interesting story of how she visited Israel, fell in love and was about to take her first trip to California to visit his family. Furthermore, she just happened to have a stack of photographs in her back pocket to share with us.

It was a nice way to end our little vacation and I think I've recovered from all the activity and am ready to return home tomorrow.

Local flavor, Orland-ho style

Yesterday, while the crew hit Disney World again, I suffered from the weekend's excesses and failed to emerge from our hotel suite. I spent most of the day watching MTV and stuffing my face with food.

Mahogany Sparkle's flights didn't cooperate with his schedule so he was forced to spend another night with us in Orlando instead of returning home. And instead of hitting the big gay closing events last night, we opted instead to visit the local bars.

The first bar we tried to visit was closed so we went to the Savoy Orlando, where we claimed a spot and commented on the local flavor. One drunk homo was particularly entertaining, with his sultry dance moves and the blond highlights in his hair. He kept making bedroom eyes at us as he clambered over the pool table and gyrated "seductively."

Also fun was figuring out we could text song requests to the DJ and having my request honored (Damaged!) while he completely ignored my friends' request for some Janet Jackson.

Disney day

After waking up two hours later than planned, Roommates A&J, Selives, Mahogany Sparkle and I hit Walt Disney World! We spent the majority of the day walking through Epcot Center and enjoying the attractions.

And even though it's Gay Days at Disney, we were all pretty horrified to see a bi-plane circling above the park, advertising a gay porn website. After all, Disney's still a family-oriented theme park with impressionable kids running around.

We also hit the Magic Kingdom where there were homos a-plenty. Gays were encouraged to wear red shirts to proudly proclaim their gayness and there was no shortage of men and women in red shirts, denim shorts and horrible highlights. For all the stereotypes about gays being fashion-forward, there sure are a ton out there without any sense of style at all.

Overall, it was a fun but exhausting day, filled with fun highlights:

* A man, fed up with his daughter's temper tantrum, trying to make her stop screaming by squirting a bottle of water in her face

* The five of us screaming and laughing our way through a ride simulating an automobile test course

* Mahogany Sparkle claiming that we were in town for Star Wars weekend and that Roommate J came dressed as Chewbacca

* Seeing all the little girls made up as Disney princesses

* Correctly surmising that Roommate A would sleep with a man who resembled Roommate J in college, due to his streaky highlights and '90s candy raver style

Celeb sighting: Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency

Last night at the homo party at Disney's Typhoon Lagoon, several models from the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency were frolicking among the gays, including cutie Danny Nunez!

Islands of adventure

Selives and I just returned from spending the day at Islands of Adventure, playing on the roller coasters and all the rides. I think my favorite roller coaster was the Hulk, while Selives's was the Flying Unicorn.

Imagine two grown men squished into a little unicorn-shaped roller coaster made for kiddies, with Selives screaming! And you know what? Hangovers and roller coasters don't go together.

I'm totes tired but somehow need to rally for the big party tonight!

It's curtains!

So now I find myself live blogging whilst Selives is making love with a man and whilst Roommates A&J are brushing their teeth. I, however, am watching the best parts of Enchanted and enjoying the television.

Selives and his lover put some red curtains on the ground to throw us off the trail, but I think I know what's going on behind closed doors!

LBP

Selives is stroking some boy's limb and I am live blogging on the couch. Meanwhile Selives was talking about how Lucy Ricardo stayed with him for nine days. That may be a lot of days.

Now the Roommates A&J are criticizing Selives. I'm going to stay out of it and play DJ. I sort of am enjoying Estelle...

Am I only dreaming?

Selives and I returned to the hotel and our cab was playing ... Eternal Flame!!! Now we're back at the hotel with Roommates A&J.

Coco loco

I've spent the day flying across the country and now I'm in Orlando with Selives! Roommates A&J arrive later tonight and Mahogany Sparkle joins us tomorrow. In the meantime, we're going to head to the resort bar and drink coco locos!

For an old man you ain't bad in a fight. What are you, like 80?

Puppy and I caught the new(ish) Indiana Jones flick last night in the historic Castro Theatre. Apparently, it's been ages since a first-run movie played at the Castro so this is kind of a big deal.

In my opinion, the movie was exactly what it should have been. It was fast-paced, fun, over-the-top and oozing with cheese. It had your requisite bad-guy caricatures, archaeological mythology and impossibly close brushes with death. And even in his advanced age, Harrison Ford was fun to watch as Indy.

The only thing that I didn't appreciate was the whole Roswell angle. C'mon Spielberg, this ain't E.T.!

Tuesday, bloody Tuesday

I set aside some time this morning to get some blood drawn at my doctor's orders. He needed verification that a vaccination had "taken hold" so I had to march myself down to the local lab.

Since I had blocked off my entire morning for this activity, I decided that I would hit the gym before my bloody ordeal and that I would reward myself with a sensible breakfast (huevos rancheros and chicken apple sausage) afterward. After all, having blood drawn is not a fun activity - and definitely deserves a treat.

Anyhoo, today was an arms day at the gym so when the lab technician tied off my right arm, he said, "don't you dare flex that huge gun or the tie will pop off and snap me in the eye!" I appreciated the flattery, but I'm sure the technician has seen bigger guns in his professional life - as someone who tends to medical issues in the Castro.

So now I'm sporting a piece of gauze taped to my arm - just to let people know that I had to endure a difficult Tuesday morning.

Bienvenidos a junio

I can't believe it's already June! Where has this year gone?

After a low-key weekend of cleaning and errands, I ushered in June with a Sunday Funday extravaganza yesterday! Since Babs was in town to see his boyfriend off on the AIDS Life/Cycle, I met up with him for a little Sunday brunch before picking Puppy up from the airport.

Puppy, who'd been abstaining from alcohol for 10 days whilst on medication to take care of an ailment, was keen to get his drink on so we met Mahogany Sparkle, Roommates A&J, Blanca and ChickenHawk at the bar to partake in some libations. Then it was off to support a local lesbian softball team that was raising money through selling raffle tickets and jello shots. Approximately a dozen drinks/shots later, Puppy and I were dunzo so we scarfed down some grease and a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Puppy also experienced a bit of a malfunction at the 7-11, resulting in slurpee all over his face.